The Kennedy Family Is Pretty Damn Gross and Still Joe Biden Is Worse

There wasn’t any woman a Kennedy wouldn’t take to bed. Mob boss girlfriend, communist spy, Hollywood actress, sister-in-law, widow, intern, whatever. And those are just the ones we know about. While the sex stories have died down with the passing of pants-less Uncle Teddy, the screwing continues in a different form: they now screw each other.

No, not like that – they aren’t Ilhan Omar. They’re screwing each other in metaphorical ways, symbolic ways.

There was a time when the Kennedy family stuck together. It was an admirable quality, that loyalty, even though it didn’t apply to anyone who married into the family. Well, ok, loyalty to the people who married into the family wasn’t their thing (not sure if there was a spouse who didn’t get screwed around), but loyalty to the family was demanded of them nonetheless, just ask Peter Lawford. 

Still, they weren’t outstabbing each other in the backs or sabotaging one another. The current generation is. 

You’d be hard-pressed to name many Kennedys these days. They don’t really do anything, aside from keeping the name “Kennedy” in their name either through hyphenated or simply keeping it, lest people not know they’re distantly related to people who once did something.

That’s a bit of a joke, but it’s also the truth. Name something important any living Kennedy has done. I’ll wait, go Google it. 

It’s not hidden, it doesn’t exist. 

I don’t have the affinity so many others do for the Kennedys. The only one alive in my lifetime was the guy who killed the girl, and then pretended he was the victim. Ted was a piece of garbage; a drunk who groped and grinded his way through any woman unfortunate enough to be near him. He was Ted Kennedy, who the hell could report him? His brothers were killed serving the country.

It's a testament to the power of public relations that what his brothers did elevated a bloated bastard like him to prominence. And now their kids are acting; they've accomplished things in life too, beyond simply being the Kennedy sperm that cracked the eggs.

Their greatest accomplishments appear to be walking upright with those jaws jutting out of the fronts of their heads. 

All the entitlement you can imagine over glory that cannot be passed down; these Kennedys have rallied around the only President we’ve ever had less intellectually capable of doing the job than JFK after Dealey Plaza. The question should be “Why?”

In a video that sounds like it was recorded at a party, featuring proof that inherited wealth is not the key to good dental work or attractive genetics, a group of unaccomplished narcissists announced they endorse a man who is accused of rape by a former staffer and of showering with his daughter when she was so old it aided her spiraling into drug addiction. If it sounds like a bad sitcom, that’s only because it nearly is. 

In a normal year, what any Kennedy had to say about anything wouldn’t matter. Sure, Democrats would drag one or two of them out a couple of times to do media interviews as a campaign surrogate, but nothing much more than that. And certainly not all of the ones in this video, who you’d have to look up to know how they’re related to any of them. But honestly, there hasn’t been a Kennedy who mattered since Teddy kicked. What his kids or cousins or nieces and nephews, or however these people are related (to be honest, I didn’t care enough to look it up) think about anything is of less interest to me than a mediocre “man on the street” interview, and I have zero pieces of post-digested food stuff to give about that.

That Biden’s handler dug up and dusted off a group of people named Kennedy is a testament to just how scared they are that people think of Joe Biden for what Joe Biden has done and look at Robert Kennedy Jr as a viable alternative. 

Biden’s presidency has been what you would assume is a series of mistakes, only it’s the progressive agenda. They hate America but recognize normal Americans are different from the spoiled, rich brats covered in Arafat doilies goose-stepping around college campuses calling for the death of all Jews. 

Real Americans aren’t looking to remake or “fundamentally transform” the country into a toilet for Third World castoffs and corporate cronyism to make their friends richer. The only way to do it is to make the way things are so horrible that people will embrace anything on the promise that it will be better. It’s how the old Nazis wormed their way into power in Germany, so it makes sense that the modern version of the Nazis would do the same with the last President old enough to have been alive when his ideological forefathers tried to impose their will on Europe. 

That the Kennedy Klan would sign up for is odd. JFK and RFK were of the left, or at least what the left was back then. They both still liked the country. They were anti-communist, though Bobby became sympathetic to some of the causes near the end. Their family since then has almost no redeeming qualities. And now they no longer have the loyalty that, at least on the surface, appeared to be their only remaining good one. 

I imagine family vacations at the Kennedy Compound this summer will be awkward, as siblings and cousins come to terms with a betrayal that can only be seen as being for a few seconds of unearned relevance because earning it would be too much like work. A series of lucky sperms making a vain attempt to appeal to people who work for a living. The lies of people impacted by the deliberate disasters of Joe Biden’s administration, insisting he is their only hope to preserve democracy.

Honest people with a case to make wouldn’t have to try to scare their audience. Of course, honest people wouldn’t be associated with Joe Biden over their own relatives. 

His whole life, Joe Biden has aspired to be JFK. It’s probably why he attacked Tara Reade (no way she’s alone, except in her courage to speak out), why he had his affair with Jill while she was still married to her first husband, and why he grabs, gropes, sniffs and nibbles on every woman and girl he can get close enough to. Joe is dumb, and dumb people mistake force for a lot of things, in his case it’s charm. 

Time will tell if a bunch of has-been and never-were Kennedys extolling the virtues of a senile pervert can be a difference-maker, or whether the candidate Kennedy, the leftist in the race able to string together a coherent sentence, will end up seizing the mantle of the future of the Democratic Party. I don’t know what will happen, but they all do deserve each other. 

Derek Hunter is the host of a free daily podcast (subscribe!) and author of the book, Outrage, INC., which exposes how liberals use fear and hatred to manipulate the masses, and host of the weekly “Week in F*cking Review” podcast where the news is spoken about the way it deserves to be. Follow him on Twitter at @DerekAHunter.